Tuesday, January 5, 2016

New Year's Marriage Resolution

I'm not really a big resolution person, probably because I'm constantly attempting some kind of diet. And as a mama to two under two the reality is that I don't have much energy or extra time for an exercise program these days either. But this year I've felt pretty strong about setting some family goals, specifically for my marriage. In 2016 I want to be more intentional about quality time (my love language) with my husband.

Before we were mommy and daddy we were really good at this! Like really good at this. Then came a little one who hijacked our attention. And then another one 14 months later. I kept waiting for things to settle down so Matt and I would have more time to invest in one another but we continued in survival mode as things continued to get more wild (two surgeries for Thomas, my surgery and recovery, etc.). Then, for one reason or another, something always seems to come up and time away from our kids have became a rare occasion. In fact, our only overnight getaway without our minis has been our hospital stay for my double mastectomy. And that was a blast. Morphine cocktails, delicious hospital meals, long naps...kidding. 

But seriously, Matt is so damn important to me and I couldn't be more proud to be his wife. So I am going to do my best this year not to let our marriage come second to caring for our little people. 

For 2016 we've blocked one night each month (at the minimum) to go on a date. I don't even care what we do as long as we're together. We used to do this before Thomas arrived and that time together was exactly what we needed to break away and connect without the distractions of our devices or sippy cup refills. In addition to more regular dates, we are planning to get away for two weekends this year without the kiddos. We have some fun trips in the works and I am so excited about them.

 Cheers to 2016!

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33 comments:

  1. Thank you for the reminder of how important date nights are ♥

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  2. I am RIGHT THERE WITH YOU! I said the SAME thing to my husband. We're not one for Resolutions, but this year, I want to focus more on my marriage. Focus on being a WIFE, and not just a MOMMY. We have had 3 date nights since our son was born almost 10 months ago. Something isn't right about that. We both LOVE our son to pieces, but we also need to love OURSELVES and our MARRIAGE more. So, DITTO! I'm also planning one night a month just for US! Actually, we've already got a sitter lined up for January 23. Counting down the days! Cheers to us sticking with this. I know our spouses will appreciate it! I know I will!

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  3. Amen! These tiny humans take so much, and while worth it, it is hard to stay connected. I love your date idea and I think I'll have to jump on the band wagon. I wouldn't be who I am without him.

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  4. So so important! Life gets so busy and before you know it it's been months without an actual "date". I always feel so rejuvenated after quality time with my man. Gorgeous pic!

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  5. Date nights!! Need to do some more of these myself. We usually do it about 6-7 times for the year but so need to improve!

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  6. What a great resolution! You have had a tough year, but I am sure 2016 has better things in store!

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  7. This is the best goal I have read - and so important to you both. MC and i have agreed to do the same this year and we are working on it - it is a must! And I am so excited for it x

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  8. So necessary! This is inspiring me to talk to Kevin about the same thing tonight!

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  9. Marriage definitely is first! God, husband, then children. We don't get to go out real often, but we have 'date night' at home each week, try to cook something special for just us. It's harder for us, we have no family nearby, and 6 children age 7 and under. I greatly cherish the time we do get away! :)

    -Jackie

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  11. We're doing the same thing. My new Simplified Planner is really helping me tackle my lack of organization and planning for date nights. We have our first one coming up in a couple of weeks! I'm so excited! No kids!

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  12. It's definitely so important to make time for each other! Great resolution!

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  13. love this :) i really need to make more time for dates with H! xo jillian - cornflake dreams

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  14. Found your blog somehow on Insta :) Glad I did, I'm excited to follow along! and I love this post - interesting how sometimes the one we love most can be 2nd place (or even further back in the line....)

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  15. Thank you for the reminder of how important it is to always work on and be mindful of your marriage. It is so easy, especially with young children (mine are 2 and 3) to get caught up in being the best parent, but I need to also work on being the best partner I can be. Love your blog - praying for health and happiness for you and your sweet family in the new year!

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  16. I LOVE this idea. Count me in. (No babies, just work too much.). Love that picture of you two!!

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  17. Love this!! Chad and I try to do a date on/around the 15th, which is our anniversary. It's so nice to just be in a car with no kids and have a conversation. Whatever we do beyond that is like icing on the cake!! :)

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  18. I love this. And it is something my husband and I have been striving to do since our twins were born (one year ago last week). Some months we are great about it, and others not so much. I want to focus on him more too and have two weekend getaways. Thanks for sharing.

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  19. I might steal this plan. Ok, I am going to.

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  20. Yes! Right there with you! A good marriage is the best gift parents can give their children. Love this picture of y'all! Happy New Year!

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  21. Such a great "resolution" for 2016! We just had our first little one and have really put an effort forward to do a date night once a month. Its crazy how much better our home life is if we put aside this dedicated time. Cheers to this new year!

    -Erin, Attention To Darling Blog

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  22. B and I NEED to do this too. Because I know just how you feel, mama. While we definitely haven't been dealing with as much on the medical end as you have lately, having two small children is a death recipe for date nights...if you LET it be. And my husband and I are totally guilty of that. Thanks for this reminder!

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  23. Love this! Even though we don't have kids yet, we want to take some small weekend trips together to experience new sights and reconnect. So important to keep your marriage first!

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  24. I love that you have decided to start doing this! We haven't been on a date free without a little one in tow since before Oliver was born six months ago. This is a great reminder that it's so important to keep your marriage fresh and a top priority. It's something we should really do... finding a sitter is the hard part. But if you all can make it a priority - so can we! Thanks for this :)

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  25. This just really pulls at my heartstrings because it's so, so important. God asks us to keep Him first, our spouse second and our children after our spouses. With little ones it's hard to keep it in this order, I know :) Good for you guys!

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  26. Such a great reminder & idea! I was just telling my Matt last night that I wanted to go on a date night! Sadly, I don't remember the last true date night that we had but, it's now in the works!

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  27. We said we will do this too. We have one babysitter though and she has a lot going on at the moment. Hopefully things will settle down and we can sit down with her and put some dates on the calendar!

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  28. This is my kind of resolution! And just what y'all need after a rough year. xoxoxox!

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  29. I love this! My husband and I need to make a similar resolution! With a 9 month old and him working away from home 10 months of the year, we've really struggled to have time for each other. It's important to remember to care for our marriages as much as we care for our little ones! Happy new year!

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  30. Good for you! I chose to focus on a word this year & I chose intentional. Especially intentional in my marriage. Life with little ones is nothing but crazy & I definitely need to put our marriage back in front.

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  31. Love this! My son is almost 4.5 months old and I'm only now feeling ready to leave him, but now that I am I think a monthly date of any kind is our plan as well. It's definitely very hard to make quality time for one another!

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